Inspirace byla čerpána z vlastních zdrojů a taktéž ze stanov FC 1592
Příručka pro hráče ASŽB
pokyny se průběžně upravují, aby se neohleděly a nezveřejňují, aby nebyly zneužívány. Takže pro ty, kteří nechodí pravidelně žádná škoda, když je neznají. Čas od času je však dobré provést změny, aby se nahradila zbytečná opatření. Úprave je možná pouze na výročce kvalifikovanou větsinou (2/3 všch členů).
Preambule
Je velmi smutné když se sportovci opíjejí. Je úžasné, když se my alkoholici pokoušíme sportovat.
Bod 1 Cíl sdružení
Nacházet potěšení z fotbalu bez pomoci rozhodčích, podplacených hráčů soupeře a s pomocí boží se vyhýbat následným manželským konfliktům, nedej bože rozvodům.
Bod 2. Členství
Hráčem ASŽB může být kdokoliv s kým se můžou ostatní domluvit, pokud možno ponašem.
Bod 3. Dochvilnost
Hráč ASŽB je povinen docházet na akce včas, nejlépe před započetím akce. Nedochvilnost může být postižena dle bodu č. 5 ;-)
Hráč přichází řádně vybaven svým dresem, trenýrkami a kopačkami a v úterý nejbližším svému datu narození jednou až dvěma lahvemi tekutého daru Moravy.
Bod 4 Nominace
Přednost nastoupit má hráč, který se zúčastnil předchozího vítězného, remízového nebo smolně prohraného utkání, ledaže by v boji o místo v základu podlehl úplatku ze strany jiného hráče, přičemž
a) hráč, jenž v této chvíli dluží příspěvky, automaticky míří na lavku;
b) mají-li hráči svou povinnost splněnu, je volba na starším;
c) pokud dluží oba hráči, nevím
Bod 5 Pokuty
O udělení pokuty a její výši se rozhoduje vždy a výhradně za přítomnosti přestupce a to na nejbližším možném briefingu po akci ASŽB. Pokuta je zpravidla udělována v tekutém stavu a splatná okamžitě čímž je provinění zahlazeno a již nemůže být nikdy uplatněno ze strany nepřítomných členů ASŽB.
Bod 6 Prémiový hlt
Pobídková prémie pro hráče, jenž nastupuje k pátému utkání v řadě nebo ke svému jubilejnímu (každému desátému). Hlt mu zprostředkuje tajemník pro zvláštní úkoly, jež bude zvolen na Výroční schůzi a bude s sebou nosit pleskačku. (většinou má v kabele něco na "dýchání" vždycky Dušan ;))
Bod 7 Penalty
Za nerozhodnutého stavu kope hráč, jehož určí nejstarší přítomný člen ASŽB. Při rozdílu vyšším než dva góly v prospěch ASŽB kope nejstarší hrající hráč. Hovoříme o tzv. hovnoidní penaltě, jelikož o hovno ide.
Bod 8 Příspěvky
Bude zaplaceno do výroční schůze v daném kalendářním roce. Nesplnění podléhá bodu č. 5;-) Vybírá určený činovník klubu, nikoli El Presidento.
Bod 9 Start v dresu soupeře
Žádný z hráčů ASŽB nebude startovat v dresu soupeře, ledaže by si to výslovně přál.
Bod 10 Přijetí nového člena ASŽB
1. Zájemce musí být navržen členem ASŽB a pokud se zájemcem souhlasí ostatní členové přítomní na následujícím briefingu po treninku, od tohoto data počíná roční zkušební doba. Zájemce má právo se přednostně účastnit akcí ASŽB, přičemž je to jeho povinnost. Výdaje si hradí po celou zkušební dobu sám, pokud není stanoveno jinak.
2. Na Výroční schůzi nebližší konci zkušební doby, je zájemce pozván, kde musí výslovně prohlásit, že má zájem stát se členem ASŽB. Po následné diskusi, ze které může být zájemce vykázán, je provedeno veřejné hlasování zdvižením ruky. Pro přijetí je potřebná 2/3 většina všech členů.
3. Zájemce musí být buď v současnosti obyvatel Vlčnova nebo rodilý vlčnovjan bydlící mimo obec nebo jinak prospívat ASŽB.
Bod 11 Vyloučení člena
O vyloučení, ať dočasném nebo doživotním, rozhoduje Výroční schůze 4/5 většinou. Důvodem pro vyloučení může být cokoliv, návrh na vyloučení může podat kdokoliv.
Bod 12 Klubové ceny
Udělují se vždy na Výroční schůzi a jejich počet je neomezený. Kritéria pro udělení ceny se mohou změnit před samotným vyhlášením vítěze, pokud tento není přítomen.
Bod 13 Pravidlo o pičování
Kdo má v piči výročku, nemá nárok celou dobu do příští výročky na cokoliv pičovat. Kdo bude usvědčen při pičování bez nároku na pičování, dostane po piči.
Poslední úprava 3.1.2014
Komentáře
Přehled komentářů
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(Lamagailt, 8. 3. 2024 21:39)
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BTC PROFIT SEARCH AND MINING PHRASES
(Lamagailt, 22. 3. 2024 1:36)